


Are You Satisfied?

by wayxvx



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Marina and the Diamonds, Song fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-07
Updated: 2013-03-07
Packaged: 2017-12-04 14:41:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/711873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wayxvx/pseuds/wayxvx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I fell in love with Marina and the diamonds and I suddenly had the urge to write a song fic for Matthew Pike and Samandriel. Since my head canon is Matt from Bugs ( 1x08 ) is Samandriel's vessel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Are You Satisfied?

_I was pulling out my hair, The day I cut the deal_  
 _Chemically calm, Was I meant to feel happy_  
 _That my life was just about to change?_

Samandriel remembered the day Matt had agreed to be his vessel. It was very frustrating for the boy to make up his mind. Stay with his friends and significant other? Or to help save the world? He was chosen after all. Samandriel spent the day watching over Matt in a temporary vessel and waiting for his agreement in order to use Matt. In the end Matt had agreed but he made Samandriel promise him he'd be okay. Samandriel promised him, poor innocent Matthew didn't know he was lying through his teeth. Samandriel knew Matt would more than likely not make it out of this, but he desperately needed him in order to warn the Winchester boys.

_One life pretending to be, The cow that got the cream_  
 _Oh, everybody said_  
 _Matthew is a dreamer_  
 _People like to tell you what you're gonna be_  
 _It's not my problem if you don't see what I see_  
 _And I do not give a damn if you don't believe_  
 _My problem, it's my problem, That I never am happy_  
 _It's my problem, it's my problem_  
 _On how fast I will succeed_

The only reason Matthew had agreed was because he was sick of his family telling him everything they wanted him to be. "Be a doctor! Or something other than messing around with those disgusting bugs!" Nothing ticked him off more than people expecting him to do things he didn't like. He wanted to be an entomologist because it interested him and he has always loved studying insects. They expected so much more out of him that he felt he couldn't accomplish. He hated being around his family due to them always nagging him or trying to kill his "pets". His family acted like it was his job to make him unhappy with himself, to make him think he was nothing but a disappointment ( which he more than likely was to them. ) and ashamed of who he was. Matthew acted like he didn't care about their opinions.

_Are you satisfied with an average life?  
Do I need to lie to make my way in life?_

The one question Samandriel had asked him before getting into the topic about vesselism was if he was happy with the life he had now. Matthew honestly wasn't. He hated it. Everything about it. The people around him, his family, the place he lived. So he told Samandriel the truth and the story behind why. "I understand completely." The angel said to his future vessel, nodding slowly and smiling at him sadly.

_High achiever don't you see?_  
 _Baby, nothing comes for free._  
 _They say I'm a control freak, driven by a greed to succeed._  
 _Nobody can stop me._

Matt agreed to being a vessel. Maybe it would make his parents proud of him for once? Fighting on the side of Heaven for them to be safe, no matter how much he hated them for being judgmental about his interests, he wanted nothing more but for them to be safe. What he hadn't expected was the pain and suffering he would go through in the future of this new job. He would later grow used to it, Samandriel thought to himself as he continued to speak to the young man about the consequences.

_Cause it's my problem_  
 _If I wanna pack up and run away_  
 _It's my business if I feel the need to, smoke and drink and sway_  
 _It's my problem, it's my problem_  
 _If I feel the need to hide_  
 _It's my problem if I have no friends, and feel I want to die_

Matt had seriously thought about it a couple times.. The suicide way out. He had backed out plenty of times at a strange force. He later came to the conclusion it was Samandriel all along. He was grateful for Samandriel, but also started to pity himself. Samandriel may be kind now, but he still wasn't a friend. Just an angel looking for a meat suit to use for now. He had always been seen as a freak in school and society, no matter where they went. It made him sick just thinking about how he had been treated all this time.

_Sad inside_  
 _In this life_  
 _Unsatisfied praying_  
 _Sad inside_  
 _In this life_  
 _Unsatisfied waiting_

Matt regretted this decision to be a vessel as soon as he saw Crowley step into the picture. He had begged to Samandriel to take him back home and release him from the pain. He prayed every day and night to the angel using him as a way to communicate with humans to let him go or numb the pain, or to help him. The only response he received was only a small "We'll be gone soon, you will be safe Matthew, I promise." Samandriel felt a strong worry and regret for the human inside. It destroyed him to hear the screams and sobs of pain from his vessel. Matthew remained to wait for the angel to tell him he was free to go but it never came.


End file.
